How to Build an Amazing Relationship with Jamie Bronstein
By Mary Maxey
October 24, 2019
In today’s episode, our guest is Jamie Bronstein. She is a relationship therapist, coach, host of “Love Talk Live” on LA Talk Radio, wife, and mama. She was also named the #1 relationship coach transforming lives in 2020 by YahooFinance. For the past 20 years, Jaime has guided people from around the world as they navigate the peaks and troughs of dating and relationships.
[2:50] Why should I listen to you?
You should listen to me because I have a lot of value to offer and I can change your life. I can also expand on it if you want to know how and why I can change your life.
[3:42] Can you take us back to where you navigated through life?
I’ve been a psychotherapist for 20 years. I also have the fact that I didn’t meet my husband until I was 34 years old. Being “in the field,” as I call it, entails a lot of dating experience. So I had to go through trial and error until I met my husband, and I’ve also been on a spiritual journey, so I have a certificate in spiritual psychology. Putting all of this together—my own experience, hearing my client’s stories, and just practicing,I feel that, as well as my spiritual stuff, is genuinely life-changing.
[5:12] How did you drive into the realm of spirituality after psychology?
I have an undergraduate degree in psychology and a master’s in social work. I’m a licensed clinical social worker (LCSW), and I got 3000 hours before I was even a licensed clinical social worker and did clinical work for years. All of a sudden, I discovered spirituality. I thought I was going to start a school or some kind of movement in psychology and spirituality as I went along on my spiritual journey. Then, I found something called the University of Santa Monica, which is a spiritual psychology program. I was drawn to spirituality, and some of the reasons were because it helped me not suffer anymore. It helps you learn how to rise above and see life through a different lens of perception.
[7:30] In your opinion, what is love?
Love is first a feeling and intuition and until you’ve experienced it, people settle. So I always try to inspire people to not ever settle for less. True love sounds cheesy, but true, authentic, deep connection, and romantic with your soul mates. Your birthright to have this kind of love does exist, and until you experience it, it’s hard to explain. But the only way to explain it is that it is a feeling that feels like home.
[9:38] How do all these pieces of stuff come together?
I would say one of the main reasons why I wrote my book is to inspire people. It is to let people know that it is their birthright to love and what my book helps you do is to figure out what is that missing piece between you and finding that love. There’s unconditionally loving yourself. There’s believing it’s going to actually happen. It’s getting very clear on what you are manifesting. As humans, we’re always manifesting and if you aren’t manifesting love you’re manifesting something and you may not like that thing you’re manifesting.
[11:30] What does manifestation mean to you and how is it showing up in people’s lives currently?
The truth is you’re not only just manifesting love. You are manifesting positive and negative things. So I mentioned that unconditional Self Love is a really important part of manifesting anything and. It all starts with the fact that our outside experiences are a reflection of our inner reality. We’re constantly manifesting people in our lives that have a reflection of what’s going on inside of us. So I help people to resolve their unresolved issues, to heal those unresolved issues and negative limiting beliefs.
Sometimes, our negative consciousness makes us believe that we are not good enough and we don’t deserve love. People go through this a lot and that is why I decide to bring the truth to them. What is the truth? The truth is you are worthy of love, you’re capable of love. People indeed have trust issues, and it doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time. It takes practice. It is a practice and that’s how I would define how we are always manifesting even when we’re not even trying to.
[14:10] What’s the first step for manifestation to take place?
You have to admit there’s a problem first and it takes awareness. So first you need to realize there is a problem and then you start getting aware of these negative thoughts. Some people claim to be fearless and void of negative thoughts. That’s not true because we are humans. We have a human reign and a mind. What matters is what you choose to do with those thoughts and feelings. So the thought comes in, is this true? This is not true. This is just my ego trying to keep me safe. It’s Fear-based. It’s not the truth. Right at that moment, what is the truth? So it’s catching it and like I said, it is a practice.
[16:15] How does somebody face the negativity phase of life?
I always say that life happens for us, not to us. If you look at things in that way, then you know that everything that happens in life is an opportunity for growing and learning and getting closer to yourself. Ask yourself questions like: Why did this happen? What is my soul seeking? For me to learn from this? And then you take it to the next step of what am I going to do about it? Am I going to change the narrative? Am I going to stay in victim mode? I know that the universe gives us what we focus on so if we’re focused on identifying as a victim, you will be a victim. You have to make a choice. It’s like saying I’m going to do this work and it is not easy. You’re saying it’s hard at the beginning but the moment you try, it becomes easier.
[24:50] How do you utilize your intuition?
So here’s the thing. Intuition is the most important part of life. Intuition to me is being in your integrity and being connected with yourself. We’re all born with intuition but on just a very simple level. Everybody can work on strengthening their intuitive muscles. When you are manifesting love, you want to trust yourself. You want to trust that first feeling that you have that guts. Five times it is a physical feeling. Some people feel it, they get the chills, and some people feel it in their bellies. Some ask their best friends to figure out how they are truly feeling. Because what I would do might be different than what you would do. But what matters is loving yourself first before you are in a relationship.
[27:40] What is the difference between fear and intuition?
There are two things in life and it is either fear or love. There is the fearful choice and there is the loving choice.
[31:05] How do we introduce intuition into relationships?
In a relationship, it’s really important to know the difference between a compromise and a sacrifice. A sacrifice is when you are out of your intuition or your integrity. So when you do something that does not feel aligned with your morals or values, you are out of your integrity. That’s the relationship you don’t want to be in or you just need to work on this with whoever you’re with and verbalize it. If it happens that there’s a lot of fear in your relationship, then I would say life is short and that’s probably not your person.
[44:32] What promise did God make to the world when he created you?
That I will bring more love to this world and inspire people to know that true love exists. I will also bring joy, love, peace, and less suffering to the world in this lifetime.
Keynotes
[19:35-19:38] You can’t change what happened to you but you can change what you are going to do.
[21:10-21:12] You can’t give out what you don’t have inside you.
How to connect with Jamie Bronstein
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Website: https://therelationshipexpert.com/
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