In today’s episode, our guest is Ruth Proctor, mother, a serial entrepreneur, and the best-selling author behind “I Survived; You Can Too.” Placed in Foster care at the age of 6, Ruth forced to make mature life adjustments at a very early age.
[6:52] Why should we listen to you?
It would help if you listened to me because I have been an entrepreneur for 16 years. I’m the rose that grew from concrete, and I have a story to tell. From a small town in North Carolina, I was in foster care at the age of six. And from that burst, I’m resilient that continues to push; no matter what odds are stacked against me, I continue to move forward and go forward. So I think that alone should be a reason for someone to talk to me.
[7:44] How I survive
At the age of around five to six years old, my mom is diagnosed with mental illness. While the community was watching us, my mom began to outsmart the system and run. After countless of running, eventually, they do take me from her. My brother and I were placed into multiple foster care programs. I realized my life that I knew it was no more. I was molested in foster care. I was touched by my brother’s father, who was supposed to protect me and watch over me. To know that you still could get out no matter what you go through, you can still be successful as an entrepreneur and person. It’s been a roller coaster, but I’m grateful. I’m humbled. And I’m here now to help other people know that you can get out. No matter what adversity you face in life, and you know. I want people to know you can be anything you want to be when you’re a person.
[10:37] Journey to entrepreneurship
At 14, I began to work on my part-time job and really didn’t have any weigh-in on me at the time. But now I realized that it is a lot to do with my decisions. I went to college initially thinking that I was going to be a lawyer. I got my bachelor’s in political science thinking I was going to be a lawyer. And then when those gears switched, began to work in the mental health field. I went from being a P. P, to being the CEO of the company. And so I began to open up my own agency, and then from there, I just began to open up different agencies in different states. I love giving back and doing things to give back to my nonprofit as well. So it’s been a journey.
[13:36] The book
I started 10 years ago, I began to journal. Many people told me to write a book about my story, and I just kept hearing it. God kept tugging at me. And I was like, I’m going to write a book. And so eventually, those journals became part of the book. The support and the outpour from people that didn’t know my story, didn’t know the things that they thought they knew about me. It was just the support has been outstanding. And what they see, this person is an entrepreneur working and as a mom, but you don’t know. The book will be released on 20 December 2020, when I finally decided to launch my book for my birthday.
[17:38] What was the hardest part for you to write?
Childhood was the hardest when you are writing and when you are typing, and you relive those emotions, you relive those feelings again. But when you’re writing it, it’s coming to life and then producing it and giving it to someone and knowing that they’re going to see the same things, yet It’s also painful at the same time. It was days I couldn’t write. It was days I was like, I’m not typing today. Emotionally, I can’t deal with it today.
[18:56] Have you finally forgiven these people? Do you still ever find the darkness or the anger floating around?
I have my moments. I’m a very forgiving person, but I don’t forget. So I will love you. I tend to love people, but I don’t have to have a relationship with them. I must put boundaries in place with people that I know love me. I had to learn what limits to put in place because before that, I’ll meet with him, and then I will be disappointed, or I will meet with this person, and I’ll be upset.
[25:27] What will be the most powerful lesson that you feel people could learn from the book?
No matter how many doors are closing your face, you can still make it. You can still do it. If 1000 people tell you no if one person tells you yes is worth it. And no matter how many people tell you that you can’t make it, and you can’t do it, use that and expound on that and push forward no matter what is in front of you.
[26:25] What promise did God make to the world when He created you?
No matter what is in front of you that you can get to the other side, we all have a message; we all have something that we survived. I think that’s why he created me. I believe my purpose is to show other people, no matter what you go through.
[13:22 – 13:24] “Childhood trauma always goes into adulthood trauma.”
[19:15 – 19:17] “You can love people, but you can love them from afar.”
[22:14 – 22:17] “You can’t expect someone to love you if you don’t love yourself.”